The Practice of Bar Etiquette

There’s a certain unstated protocol when it comes to the art of bar-hopping. And if you’re female, there’re even more rules to follow. Sucks, huh? Hang in there and follow these guidelines:

1. First, don’t go up to the bar without a clue what you like to drink. As powerful as bartenders are, they can’t read minds. Have something in mind, even if it’s just a flavor or brand you like.
2. Be Friendly. Give the bartenders a shit-eating grin, like all you want in this world is a drink and they are your savior. Pretty much always treat the bartender this way. He/she has all the power in this situation.
3. And don’t be afraid to lean over counter, cleavage helps!
4. When they finally take notice to your advances, be clear in your order. And if you’re still unsure, ask their favorite. Let the bartender brag about their vast liquor knowledge, they will revel in the opportunity. If they recommend something, be willing to try it.
5. Tip, heavily. Clutch singles in your hand and feel slightly dirty about the abundance of ones that you have readily available.
6. If you open a tab: Do NOT forget about it. Believe me, you don’t want to run four blocks in heels at quarter till two because you left your card at the bar. Never fun.

Now you’re ready to get your drink on: go forth and prosper.

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